I can hardly believe it, but my little man is weaning. Early in my pregnancy I blogged about how incredibly unhappy he was that my milk had almost entirely dried up. It was a very difficult adjustment for us and I was so heart broken (My milk did not dry up nearly as quickly with Olivia and she nursed until the end the my pregnancy with Lila. She was not phased in the least. A reminder that every pregnancy can, indeed, be different. Comparing one mother to another or one pregnancy to another is fairly fruitless) about the entire situation.
After several weeks, he started to eat more table food and found a happy place. He would nurse at nap times, bed time and a couple times in the middle of the night. It was comfort nursing, but it worked for him. He was content. I was relieved.
Recently, we traveled to Slovenia and Croatia and he nursed every morning for at least one hour straight. We laid in bed together while he nursed through his last hour or more of sleep. It was a bit trying for me because I don't sleep and nurse easily. However, it kept him quiet which, in turn, let everyone sleep an extra hour or more each morning. Weaning was not on the horizon - or so I thought.
Upon returning home a couple of weeks ago, you can imagine my surprise when he stopped asking to nurse. At times, when I offered, he would pull away and grab for something else, distracting himself. As it stands now, if I don't offer, he doesn't ask. When I do offer, he will nurse for a few seconds, smile up at me, play with my hair, come unlatched, point to my nipple, say "ball" and run off.
I had planned on tandem nursing. While that is not entirely out of the question, it will be up to me if I want that to happen or not. I can continue to offer and keep him nursing up to a few times a week (so he doesn't "forget" how to latch properly), or I can discontinue altogether.
Both situations require some thought. If this baby is as tongue-tied as he was, my main focus will be getting tongue and lip tie revisions and a proper latch. In my experience as a lactation counselor, I've noticed that most toddlers, even if they were mostly-weaned during the pregnancy, love the new milk coming in and take up nursing whole-heartily. In some cases this contributes to over-supply of milk, which I have struggled with each time (Yes, it is possible to have an over-supply instead of low-supply. Both can present great challenges). If I'm dealing with newborn latch issues, over-supply and an over-eager nursing toddler, I could be in for some very big challenges. Then again, it may go better than expected and I my worry will have been for nothing.
It's another journey in my life as a mother. We'll figure it out as we go along. I'm not going to stress too much about it. These things have a way of working themselves out. I also have more resources available to me than many other moms have (or know they have).
On the plus side, as Colden has weaned himself, he has started sleeping through the night. Yes, finally!! He's 21-months and with Matt deploying soon for 9-10 months, it couldn't have come at a better time. I am beyond thrilled! Since I fiercely disagree with crying-it-out (I let my toddlers whimper a bit, however, screaming ones self to sleep is a no-no in my book. I'm not comfortable with my child's stress hormones becoming elevated due to my selfishness. I say that even as a mother who has a chronic illness which requires me to get proper sleep or suffer the consequences), I was worried I would be up with a toddler and a newborn several times a night. Looks like I can put that worry aside!! Phew!
If you are pregnant or thinking about getting pregnant and have a nursing infant or toddler, KellyMom provides some excellent information here: Nursing During Pregnancy and Tandem Nursing
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